Thickening suggestions please...

[confused2]

For some years the Surgeon General (or the English equivalent) has been advising us (the British public) to eat vegetables and fruit. They started off at three portions a day which I viewed as possible but unlikely and gradually increased this to seven which (I thought) took the whole thing into the realms of humour. For many years I was of the opinion that a tangerine at christmas was all the fruit a person needed for the following year.

Moving swiftly on...

Mrs C2 has become an expert vegetable cook - so we have veg. and a Knorr ™ stock cube for main meals. A surprise feature of Knorr ™ stock cubes is that they contain a lot of fat and seem to reduce the viscosity to whatever you add them to. In the 'confidence in your appearance' stakes it is becoming increasingly obvious that a person wearing clothes that are spattered with grease stains is at a disadvantage compared to someone wearing clothes that aren't.

So...

Thickening suggestions please, ideally cheap and in a tube or bottle.

[Secular Sanity]

Quick question: Does Mrs. C2 have the same problem? Are her cloths spattered with grease stains, too?

[confused2]

Quick question: Does Mrs. C2 have the same problem?  Are her cloths spattered with grease stains, too?

I sense a dark motive behind this question - regardless - as far as I am aware Mrs C2 isn't normally spattered with grease stains. Occasionally toothpaste but not grease.

In the ingredients cupboard I found a tinned herring, a jar of Marmite and some ancient self-raising flour.  Adding half a teaspoon of the flour to the mix before microwaving improves matters considerably so thickening does seem to be the answer. Another time I might try adding the herring and/or the Marmite.

[Secular Sanity]

I sense a dark motive behind this question - regardless - as far as I am aware Mrs C2 isn't normally spattered with grease stains. Occasionally toothpaste but not grease.

I don’t have a dark side. That's just my sense of humor. Mwahahaha!  

It’s just a simple observation, that’s all.  You implied that Mrs. C2 was preparing the vegies, and you were both eating them, but you have to wonder why Mrs. C2 isn’t spattered with grease stains, too. That leads me to believe that it’s not the cubes. Maybe men in general are just sloppier eaters.  

Cookie Monsters

[confused2]

It’s just a simple observation, that’s all. You implied that Mrs. C2 was preparing the vegies, and you were both eating them, but you have to wonder why Mrs. C2 isn’t spattered with grease stains, too. That leads me to believe that it’s not the cubes. Maybe men in general are just sloppier eaters.

Like I didn't see that coming. The observation is that one person is spattered with grease and the other person isn't. Let us consider the height from which the inevitable drips* from the veggies will fall back into the bowl. The higher the drip falls from the wider the spattering zone. Below a certain height the spatter won't reach the eater and above a certain height it will. The evidence presented suggests (correctly) that I am taller than my wife - nothing more and nothing less.

*reduced viscosity was referred to in the OP - reduced surface tension is a likely consequence of adding Knorr ™ to the mix.

[Secular Sanity]

The observation is that one person is spattered with grease and the other person isn't. Let us consider the height from which the inevitable drips* from the veggies will fall back into the bowl. The higher the drip falls from the wider the spattering zone. Below a certain height the spatter won't reach the eater and above a certain height it will. The evidence presented suggests (correctly) that I am taller than my wife - nothing more and nothing less.

Or maybe you just think your large and in charge.

According to what Keltcher called the “Cookie monster study,” people in charge may also be messier eaters.

I'm afraid that further observational methods may be in order.

We’ll need to know if Mrs. C2 is actually dropping veggies back into the bowl.

I’m just trying to help, C2, but I want to treat the cause not the symptoms.

[confused2]

We’ll need to know if Mrs. C2 is actually dropping veggies back into the bowl.

This is a possibility not considered in the OP - observation of one party suggests this might (occasionally) happen and might be sufficient to explain the spatter or no spatter effect. I have to agree that if a shorter person were to drop veggies back into the bowl the spattering would still occur but would be less intense and higher up relative to their height when compared to a taller person doing the same thing.  

<*splash*>Oh no, not again.

I’m just trying to help, C2, but I want to treat the cause not the symptoms.

Please share your wisdom regarding general males and any way to help them eat their veggies without er, looking like general males who have been eating veggies.

[Secular Sanity]

Please share your wisdom regarding general males and any way to help them eat their veggies without er, looking like general males who have been eating veggies.

That’s easy.  If feeling like you’re in charge causes you to be a messier eater.  Stop feeling like you’re in charge.  Instead of asking us to teach you about thickeners, ask Mrs. C2 to teach you how to prepare the vegetables, and then maybe occasionally cook for her.  

Power may affect the way we think, but it’s not our position, or hierarchy, it’s our mental state. So, keep your feet on the ground.  

While Mrs. C2 may not be concerned with your appearance, she might be concerned with your table manners.

I’m not judgin'.  I’m just sayin'.  

BTW, thanks for the tip (the cubes).