(Nov 2, 2018 03:08 AM)Leigha Wrote: [ -> ] (Nov 1, 2018 12:08 AM)Syne Wrote: [ -> ]You know it's time to move on when the goal is no longer a passion. And moving on doesn't mean that goal cannot be picked up again later. Like I said, I often cycle through goals, leaving frustrating ones alone for a while to focus on others, but I eventually get renewed energy to pursue them again. That may be one of the tricks to it. A single, all-consuming goal is probably a bad idea. It's a scarcity of goals. And since pursuing goals is a means to happiness, the more goals the better. That way you always have something to work toward.
Inventors, from my own limited experience, know when to let the mind have time to work out problems in the background. It's like the name/word you're trying so hard to remember but suddenly comes to you hours later, once you've forgotten about it. But yeah, there is a bit of self-discipline and perseverance involved. Another problem people face is not parsing out a goal into manageable steps. Too much focus on the mountain top, instead of the next step, can easily overwhelm you and seem insurmountable.
Self-pity is definitely a bad coping strategy, and high achievers are largely immune to it. I wouldn't consider myself a high achiever, per se, but I never indulge in self-pity. And that's what it is, an indulgence. It's giving in to thoughts that really do not originate with you.
So, you believe that pursuing goals is a means to happiness, but not the sole means. What makes up the rest for you? What you learn in the process? (which if we don't achieve the end goal, what we have learned along the way became a priceless bonus.) Or something else, entirely? What fills the gaps, if you run out of goals to pursue? (hypothetically speaking, a bit hyperbolic, but just for conversation-sake)
What ''advice'' if any, would you give to a nihilist? Is a nihilist capable of true, lasting happiness and peace, in your opinion?
Pursuing goals isn't a means to happiness as a goal in itself. IOW, the motivation for pursuing a goal can't be to achieve happiness; goals must have only their own ends as motivation. Happiness is only a side effect, where having it as a goal, even one step removed, likely hinders the stated goal and thereby happiness itself. In that respect it's rather fragile. Something you can't really reach for if you want to attain it.
I'm not sure there is anything more. And I'm not sure goal-oriented thinking really distinguishes a failure from progress. Learning is very often necessary for any goal, so as long as we don't get completely discouraged, any setback becomes just one of the many necessary steps toward a purpose, even refining the goal itself. One we may not have anticipated, but necessary on our particular path nonetheless.
Luckily, humans are significance generators. We can make just about anything a worthwhile goal. The down side there is that, if we don't actively create goals, we
will actively create problems. There's a kind of dichotomy between goals and problems (purposes and challenges). If we are creating and pursuing goals (so we have no scarcity of goals), the goals supply all the problems we need for an interesting life (and life is dull without any challenges to solve or overcome). But if we lack goals, the scarcity of problems will lead to a subconscious desire for problems (the overcoming of which becoming de facto goals). Any goal is better than no goal at all, even problems. I know that may sound odd, but how many people have you known that had problems you thought were trivial but they perceived as overwhelming? There's truth in the saying that we are never given more than we can handle.
And what people can handle has to do with the related dichotomy of cause and effect. Those who are more at cause in life are creating goals, while those who are more at effect are busy creating problems. While both goals and problems are internally generated, those at effect perceive their problems to be external because they feel like they are an effect of something else. It's largely a problem of self-awareness.
I suppose a nihilist can believe life is meaningless while still creating goals. They could have their own subjective meanings, even just about their own survival, while believing that life has none inherently. But more often than not it does seem that these sorts of beliefs do contribute to, or are the result of, being at effect. Learning to solve their scarcity of goals may change their general outlook.
And for those who find just up and creating goals to be difficult, there is a "baby-steps" solution. Create problems. Not like go and get yourself arrested, or into fights, or anything. Just invent problems you could be to yourself. For instance, if you don't set your alarm, you could be late for work. Doing that enough would likely get you fired. That might be a significant problem. Don't actually do it, just start inventing as many such problems as you could be to yourself. Get creative. Eventually you might just find that you suddenly have a goal.
Sorry. That's probably a lot to digest.
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