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+--- Thread: Article 4 reasons why partners cheat in healthy relationships (/thread-17674.html)
4 reasons why partners cheat in healthy relationships - C C - Mar 28, 2025
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/social-instincts/202503/4-reasons-why-partners-cheat-in-healthy-relationships
EXCERPTS: It’s one of the most perplexing betrayals—when someone in a seemingly happy relationship strays. [...] many affairs happen not out of dissatisfaction, but for far more complex emotional reasons.
Some people cheat despite loving their partner. [...] What hidden forces drive someone to risk something they cherish?
Here are four deeper psychological factors behind why some people cheat, even in happy relationships.
1. The Allure of Novelty and the Dopamine Chase
Romantic love is deeply tied to the brain’s dopaminergic reward system [...] But over time, this initial high fades. Research using fMRI scans has shown that romantic love transitions from a dopamine-fueled motivation system to a more stable, attachment-driven state supported by oxytocin and vasopressin, hormones that deepen trust and bonding. While this shift is natural and necessary for lasting commitment, some people struggle with the loss of early-stage excitement...
2. Fear of Deep Vulnerability
Paradoxically, some people cheat not because they feel disconnected, but because they feel too connected. For individuals with avoidant attachment tendencies, deep emotional intimacy can feel overwhelming, triggering fears of losing autonomy, becoming too dependent, or exposing vulnerabilities they’ve long protected...
3. The Identity Crisis—Am I Still Me?
Long-term relationships bring two lives together—routines intertwine, identities shift, and priorities blend. While this can foster deep connection, it can also lead to an identity crisis, especially for those who strongly associate self-worth with independence, spontaneity, or adventure.
Over time, some may feel they’ve lost touch with the version of themselves they used to be—the person who was single, carefree, or exploratory. They might begin to see themselves more as a partner than as an individual, leading to a sense of stagnation...
4. Unconscious Self-Sabotage
Some people cheat not because they are unhappy, but because they don’t believe they deserve happiness. When someone has grown up in a chaotic or emotionally unstable environment, a healthy, secure relationship can feel foreign, even unsettling. Instead of embracing stability, they subconsciously anticipate its end and take preemptive action to disrupt it... (MORE - missing details)
RE: 4 reasons why partners cheat in healthy relationships - confused2 - Mar 29, 2025
Long before Mrs C2.
Girl says "Would you like to come back for a coffee?"
48 hours later .. you've lost, destroyed, totally fouled up your life.
Never again.